By PETER FISCHETTI
Special to The Press-Enterprise
When Cheryl Hanlyn and her aunt, Kathryn Hurley, stood on the stage of the Riverside Convention Center last month to receive their awards, the moment was bittersweet.
"It brought back memories," said Hanlyn, who along with Hurley received one of the John L. Treadway Loving Care Awards presented by the Visiting Nurse Association of the Inland Counties.
The awards recognize people for the extraordinary loving care they have given to a family member, friend or to their community with the assistance of hospice. They are named in memory of Treadway's many years of service to the association, and are presented to residents in each of the seven areas it serves.
Hanlyn, a 27-year-old Lake Elsinore resident, provided a home and much more for her mother, Rene Vaughn, who died of cancer in August 2009 at 49. For three years after Vaughn was diagnosed with invasive basal cell adenocarcinoma, the two rode an emotional rollercoaster, Hanlyn recalled.
"My mom had surgery at UCLA to have a lump in her neck removed. It was malignant, and the doctor said she wouldn't make it. Mom said, 'I'll prove him wrong.' "
After intense radiation and chemotherapy, the cancer went into remission.
"I can't find the words to describe how I felt," Hanlyn said. "I thought she would make it."
Turn for the Worse
Shortly before Vaughn was to be declared in complete remission, a test revealed that the tumors had returned -- and had metastasized.
Immediately, Hurley left her home in Washington to join her sister, who was living with Hanlyn, her husband, Jer, and their two daughters, the youngest of whom, Natalee, was born just four weeks before the final diagnosis. Also living with them was Hanlyn's younger sister, Sara, who helped during her mother's final days.
For the next six weeks, Hanlyn said, "We were trying to help mom enjoy every moment. She wanted to watch the full moon, and to sit outside and eat ice cream, and to spend time with her grandchildren."
In presenting Hanlyn and Hurley with their awards, the association praised them for "putting their lives on hold to assure Rene's final days were filled with love, comfort and joy. Rene was allowed to laugh, cry and share her deepest feelings."
Hanlyn said the award was nice, but not anything she and her aunt expected.
"I can't imagine not being there for my mom through her final journey of life," she said. "She was my mom ... my best friend and was there for us all no matter what, and I was determined to show her the same love in return and be there till her last breath."
Others also honored
The nonprofit Visiting Nurse Association of the Inland Counties has provided home health and hospice services throughout Riverside and San Bernardino counties since 1931.
It also presented awards to:
Donna Smith Burgess. The Banning resident became the primary caregiver for her father, Donald, as well as her ill mother, while raising her own children and working as a director of mental health. She helped her father battle Alzheimer's disease while balancing the needs of her job and family.
Barstow resident Brenda Folden and her mother, Betty, ensured that her grandparents spent their final years together in their home. Brenda has become her grandmother's caregiver because advanced Alzheimer's disease requires 24-hour supervision.
Marilyn McConnell of Palm Desert cared for her husband Jimmy while Parkinson's disease had robbed him of language and mobility, Marilyn found ways to communicate and ensure she shared activities that made his life meaningful.
From Riverside, the recipient was the Haner family -- Vicki, Courtney, Morgan and Austin. Each helped their father, Bill, fight cancer for more than two years. Family members learned complicated medical procedures, allowing him to stay at home.
Matthew Ahlheim, a Victorville 15-year-old, has been a caregiver to his father and his mother for much of his life. Matthew learned much of the complicated care his father required while on strong heart IV medications and often helped cook and clean while going to school full-time.
From Yucca Valley, the recipient was Jimeen Cleveland. In addition to raising children, she dedicated her time to the Way Station for the Homeless and served on the pastoral staff for Victory Christian Center. Jimeen also took the responsibility of caring for her mother, Alicia, for many years.
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